Category: Let's talk
i am looking for a friend someone i can relate too. someone i can just talk trash with or talk deep with i feel so alone or adrift. i don't know which. i wish i could change my life but i can't hope we can be friends.
please?
ps
i am blind and have other disabilities.
You know others would curse you out or poke fun of you for creating this but as I have fallen into the role of zone nice guy I'll take the high road. I don't know you, but you sound like I was at one point in my life. I was down and I felt adrift, as you put it. Trust me, the last thing you want to do is come off forceful or needy. That may drive people off. Just be you and soon enough you'll make connections.
there is some truth in what you say. i don't want to sound needy. i am just not good in social situations and have been alone i mean without any friends for more then five years. but good advice.
you can talk to me if you like- if i'm online, shoot me a qn.
i think we would get on just from reading your original post.
my advice to you is, if you want friends so badly, just be yourself. forcing it will only accomplish pushing people away, rather then drawing them to you.
also, not having friends is something we all go through. in fact, some of us (myself included) haven't truly had friends till these last couple years.
so, toughen up, try not to take things personally, and just be happy.
Hey feel free to send me a quick note or private message when I'm on here. :)
Send me a note if you like.
Hello, you are welcome to send me a quicknote, when I'm on here.
Your request is no problem. You may send me a private mail and I will reply.
Hi there. Feel free to send me a quicknote or private message if you're on. agree about just being yourself.
hey, don't feel ashamed for stepping out and trying to find friends. Much better than hiding away because your to scared to try. Message me anytime. If I am able to, I will chat.
I will as well.
I'll just say this and yes, I'll come off as a prick but whatever:
You don't beg and ask for friends. you get them by befriending them the best way is to say hi to people, if you had just qned me and say hi and stuff asked how I am had a conversation then okay, but this whiny sniffling post? just ticks me off and puts me off as one of those useless stupid people who asks for my friendship and ends up using me. I've been hurt and used a lot like that. and I am not afraid to say it. I don't take friends just by you saying can we be friends. for friendships and to get to know someone you'll have to just get to know people, hang around others and let live. sorry it's tough but that's reality right?
I agree with the advice of not being ashamed to be yourself and put yourself out there. In the words of the wise Doctor Seus, "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." True friends aren't going to care about things that most of us have, at one point or another, worried about or tried to hide in order to get friends. Good luck, and message me whenever.
Try to socialising first. and find out and go with people who are with your interest.
Don't be shy. that's the main thing will ruin friendships, I say.
Raaj.
I give you props for posting a message specifically seeking friends, but I honestly don't know if this sort of approach will guarantee you any genuine friendships. It's very sweet that so many people have posted an invite for you to PQN then; Of course, you can probably pqn any of us and we'd give you a chance. But the way to find genuine friends is by just interracting with people. You won't automatically gain true friends because you asked for some and some responded. True friendships are built on good conversation, good chemistry, good memories; Friends need to get on well with one another in order to achieve the privilaged status of friends. that being said, good luck. I'm around too if you want to talk. Always eager to meet new people.
thanks to the prick for saying your opnion i just wanted to see how people respond to this post and at least two of you proved to be a prick. thats good to know.
but thanks ofr posting.
oh boy, crash and burn.
lol what is that supposed to mean?
They got burnt I guess.
thanks
not being a prick as I said, I wasn't, and I am actually not hurt it greatly amuses me.
Let me tell you something. I know a lot of people with multiple disability, and they can live happy lives to. No need to be so whiny. Just being real with you. In fact my boyfriend has multiple disabilities too, and there's a good example, what does he do? sit and whine and cry for more friends? no! he adjusts, is very real about it and makes a lot of friends. If you think your situation is bad, I saw you like to go out for walks I know a lot more very disabled people who don't have that luxury yet they do not sniffle and whine, like you idiotical person. They might not have the best of times with friends to, and, yet they go out there and just make friends not ask for them, no! they make them! you talk to people, as many has told you on here see what you have in common and build friendships that way. My current boyfriend, he didn't start by asking people to be his friends? hell no! he went and we started talking a lot, every day, all the time when we saw each other. we found out what we had in common and for a while we were just friends talking about this and that, we were certainly just acquaintances at first, and then we discovered we had a friend in each other because of all the views and interests we share. Same with all these other friends, I know. Same thing. You can do that too. I felt lonely at one point too, I know how being alone feels but that gives you no right to ask people to be your friends just like this. a better thing to ask which I did was, if you don't mind let me tag along with your group. not as friends but as extra people, and we'll just hang out, give me a chance to basically know me, and you'll see just who I am. and, some didn't, some did. some of the people who did became fast friends with me, while others decided no, we didn't have enough in common. It's not that hard. and, I would not mind doing just that if you shape up and stop whining.
and, this also occured to me, your plea for friends also seems one sided. It seems like you want to take but not give. With friends that have multiple disabilities that are friends with me, we give and take a lot. my talents contributes to help you in one way and in another they help me back by being a friend an equal trade. One of my friend possibly the boyfriend not saying, but he's good at grammar where as I ain't too good. so, he helps me edit, while I help him in other ways, sometimes much more abstract ways. and asking for friends seems to be asking for sympathy. friends are also there for each other supporting each other emotionally and stuff, talking it through. by what you're saying this seems very doubtful, and by your attitude, with these other people I know who have multiple disabilities, they stand up to the truth, and I can tell them stuff like this and they'll understand, and either defend themselves properly or agree. and, you can ask some of the people who truly know me well, I can be a bit sharp but also be quite a very nice person. I don't let people walk all over me, and people have tried and I've thought they were my friends.
anyway, I am just pointing these things out so you can turn around your life and make real friends if you're willing to change for the better, hell, you know I wouldn't mind being friends if we got to know each other a bit. but, I don't say right off I am your friend blah blah blah. no, we have to know each other well first.
okay sorry for that.
i know i sounded whiney or begging whatever but this
was just a test to see what kind of reception i would get
you told me the truth and i appreciate that
Well, I would say message me or PQN me, but you have me on ignore, so I guess that plan is scrapped. Also, yes, be yourself, and just step out there. We all go through times where we don't have friends to hang out with, but just make yourself stand out, be yourself, and you'll make some friends.
Wow Rachael. How about showing some sensativity once in a while. This was a test that you clearly failed. Next time, maybe you'll study harder.
I don't know if asking for friends is the right way to go about things myself, but clearly there is some insensitivity here. I do feel sorry for those who don't have friends. And yes, Rachel, how about some more sensitivity here?
I think I was too quick to judge this person by how she was asking for friends by telling her she needed to grow up, and I apologize for that. I've seen too much specialness from other people because of stuff like that, and it sounds like you are going through some depression, and I'm sorry you're going through that. I hope things will get better for you and you will end up making friends. We all have hard times in life, but you'll get through them and do just fine.
Just wanted to point out something to Rachael.
A prick is a penus soooooo. Well Rachael is a girl. So techneckly can she call herself a prick?
Just wondering.
OK. I do agree that Rachel could have showed some more sensitivity in her first post, but she changed her tune slightly and became a lot more honest. She brought up some really good points, and I have to agree. Again, not saying there's no room for a little compassion. If you're the type who is put off by people begging for friends, as I am, just don't bother responding to the request.
Jewel, much like Rachel, I'm willing to get to know you and see where things go from there. I'm not going to be nice just for the sake of being nice, but I also will not be rude for the sake of being rude. that kind of behavior is just as toxic. In short, I'm willing to give the possibility of friendship an honest try.
Yes, it is called giving the benifit of the doubt.
I have no compasion with people who act like losers!
but, jule, if you can stop being one, and are just willing to talk as accquaintances, I will be willing to be a correspondence, no, not friends, as fellow users and after many messages and conversatoin maybe. I don't grant friendships just like that, so yes. And, you need to stop whining too, no one appreciates it. act more like a man and not a loser! I know you're female, but man as a generic term.
Look, I am not hartless. my boyfriend has depression, and has more then one disability. I don't mind it, as I said, as long as you don't come as a loser we'll totally get along.
Well call it what you like, but I for one am like Ocean. except I do go out of my way to be nice, but never rude.
The only way this posters going to meet me is talk to me. We might become friends, we might not, but here is the start. Lets talk.
I am me, that's that, like it or not.
And so there! Sorry but you sound childish.
okay guys as it has been pointed out to me i will try to stop being a loser and become a man although i am a femal lol
anyways thanks for your opinions i'll take it into consideration
This topic seems to have degenerated into Typical Zone BBS drama, but there is no problem with seeking to get to know new people. Hope you are able to make some new friends soon.
As do I.
So Rachael, it seems as though you will admit to being a bitch. I admire that in some ways, but why be a bitch. People either A, tend to try and avoid such people, or B, be a dick or a bitch right back.
Just as trolling is, being nasty or brutally honest with someone is pointless. I'm not talking about how Chelsea and Cody are honest, because they are more respectful than this. Some people can handle the truth, and others can't. Why do you purposely come across this way.
I can answer that. It is a defence mechanism. I've spoken to Rachael on skype and she is actually a really great person. I think she tries to drive zoners away to avoid getting hurt. It's a bit fruitless considering everybody gets hurt eventually but there you are.
Hi julia, my name is ashley, well woman of wisdom is obviously my username, but I just wanted to stop by here and introduce myself. Feel fre to send me a private quick note when i'm on here or a private message if I am not. Just wanted to offer you a place where you can come to talk about your situation. Professionally, I am a social worker/therapist, so I know about keeping things confidential but I am not offering to interact with you in that role. I am offering as an acquaintance and maybe a littel later, a friend. Have a good night and remember, a setback is just a setup for a come back!!!
A setup is a setting for a comeback...I like that.
interesting!
Ashley that is a great quote. Thanks for offering it.
old topic, a bit, because some situations require you to be harsher? and some fights require a real fighter in them.
hi and you can chat with me and hey it isn't easy to make friends for some of us because people find it hard to deal with if some one has more than 1 disability or even just with having 1 disability and i commend you for trying and i wish you all the best of luck.
yes of course; It's common sense though sadly some on here are yet to figure this out it would seem.:(
I'll be your friend if you like. My name is LaMar. I know what it's like to feel alone and have nobody to talk with.
Send me a (pm) or, (pqn)
Hello, Julia. Feel free to send me a quicknote or a private message if you'd like. My name is Milagros. Make your life less complecated by not reacting to some nasty, insensitive bitches, because clearly, that's what they want.
its John. i'll talk to anybody just ask....
never seen you on here and just so happend to be looking at the boards on a very dead zone day.
feel free to PQn or PM me. forget if i have email on or not but if i do you can feel fre to use that too.
i also have MSN AIM and Skype so plenty of ways to get ahold of me.
that is nice of you, smiles.
Feel free to send a private quicknote whenever we're on. Also my skype address is in my profile.